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TGirls Letters - TGirl Feedback to Us

March, 2012

By- tsgirlfriend4me@gmail.com

Our TGirls Letters section is devoted to feedback we receive. The most recent letters appear at the top.

Subject: Pre-op TS friend.
Date: 3/10/2012 5:04:23 P.M. Pacific Daylight Time
From: Deleted
To: tsgirlfriend4me@gmail.com


I don't know if you are still with your girlfriend, as the articles I read were several years old, but I was hoping to get some advice.

Last fall I met a TS while volunteering, we'll call her K.S., and she has become a close friend. Granted, I grew up in a small southeast Georgia town, in which we both currently live, so understand that many people around here are ignorant to her situation.

K.S. has shared many of her issues in dating with me and I've even tried to help, but being GG, that may not be much (we do try and look out for each other, so when she goes out on first dates she lets me know where and when, in case something occurs). She is living with her grandparents who are in their 70s and set in their ways. I know she is lonely and feels isolated, as do I having returned to my hometown after years away.

K.S. has tried dating online, as there aren't many natural conditions in which she can meet heterosexual men to date or be fixed up within her age group (she is 38 years old and has been in transition for eight years) at the junior college she attends. I suggested she try PlentyOfFish, because she didn't have any luck at eHarmony. I also suggested she didn't include such personal information regarding being TS on her profile page. No, she doesn't want to hide her situation but I think she should meet the guy before telling him something so personal.

She and I have talked this topic over until we are blue in the face. Not being in the same shoes, I can't give her personal advice she so desperately seems to need and she keeps pointing out that I don't understand. If she gets to the point of meeting a guy something happens and that's it, but eight out of 10 times she can't get that far. Could it be she is telling too much too soon? Does she need a refresher on online/phone etiquette?

Any advice, especially from a guy with experience in the TS dating world, could help give her some perspective. Like your article said, she didn't have the socialization GG's have and sees it from a eschewed point of view. Oftentimes she seems ultra sensitive and jumps to conclusions about the guy before even meeting him face to face. She is at the point of being constantly disappointed and resigned to a single, lonely life.



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